#WHATSHOULD BETCHESCALLME

When I actually log on to facebook for the first time in over a month

When I look back at my middle school hairstyles

When my coworker and I have to work through lunch

When a guy I’m not even remotely into tries to go in for a kiss

When I step on the scale and see the highest number I’ve ever seen

When I play mind games

When I finish half my iced latte in one sip

When I’m talking to someone after noon and they ask if I’ve been drinking

When I sit down to eat at a fancy restaurant then realize I have to leave because I can’t afford to eat there